Day 78 – Little Strides

29 lbs lost

Day of the big race! My first official attempt running a 5K! Yippie! I have been anticipating this for weeks but first I must drop in for my official Week 2 weigh of Biggest Looser contest. Walking into the gym, I slow to see a crappy Dr.’s office scale in place of the fabulous In Body Analysis scale from the previous 2 weeks. What happened? We were told that the other scale was a loner and we won’t get it back until closer to the end of the competition. To make matters worse, I heard grumblings from those weighing ahead of me that the new scale was weighing heavier than the last. Sure enough, I only saw a 2 lb loss when my scale at home said 4. Cranky! This once again put me behind in the weigh in and lands me in the 4th place spot. 4th place does not buy shakes people! My fabulous friend however crept into the #1 spot. I am very happy for her and would be even more delighted by her results if it didn’t negatively impact me. My husband is ashamed of me and I can’t say I blame him. Look what dangling a cash prize in front of me does to bring out the competitiveness. There is an Ashram somewhere that has my name booked for a future enlightenment session I’m sure but for now, game on.

I spent the day getting ready for the big race. I create an upbeat playlist for my iPod, put in my sparkly donut earrings and donned “Red Team” attire in honor of the Fitness Challenge. Of course, I have told everyone who I happen to have come in contact with over the past weeks that I was going to run the race. Everyone was rooting me on and I had visions of confetti as I crossed the finish line.

Then right before the race, a bad omen as the back to my one of my beloved sparkly donut earring fell off into the grass when I put head phones on. Oh no! Frantically rooting in the grass, it was not to be located in time. Now I would have to run the race without out my donuts. What’s a diva without her donuts? Just a bitch! Yikes!

The starting buzzer went off and I started off strong for about the first quarter mile. Then it got hard, I mean really hard. It was so much harder running outside than on the treadmill. I knew this would happen as I was just telling my neighbor last week this very same thing as she was treadmill running in prep for the race. Did I seriously think I would be exempt from this phenomenon? I felt every falling steps impact on my left dodgy knee. Not good as the dream of confetti filled finish line began to slip away. What started out as a best intention to run the entire race left me in an all out struggle to make it to the 1 mile mark. I am very sad to say that I had to stop short of the first mile marker due to the pain in my knee and general feeling of eminent death chasing my tail with no crash cart nearby.

Now I was deflated with the realization that my stint as running Goddess was squelched before my first debut. Nike would not be calling me to represent their next running shoe. Mostly, I was disappointed that this was the first real failed goal put forth on this journey. It’s not really about the running at all since I still hate it with a passion. It’s about missed expectations and humility. The added bonus of now having this failure very public was just icing on the donut. Note to self, limit sharing of huge goal with every person in the city until sure goal is at least attainable. Think dry run next time. I had no time to personally digest this failure for friends ran by raising their hands in question upon seeing me walk. I couldn’t come up with any good quips due to the lack of breath and no place for the “Snappy Come Backs” handbook in my exercise pants.

Digging in with head held high, I am me after all and lest anyone forget, this was still my moment, I walked. Waddling in my failure was for much later in bathtub sipping a protein shake. I hauled butt walking as fast as I could with the new goal to at least make a respectable time. Zipping around several 3rd graders who dawdled in the sunshine on the path in front of me clearly have a good time, I looked around for my kids. This was a family fun run after all where did my family go? Scratch that, at least where did my kids go since I knew my husband was most certainly not walking on the trail. He prefers to run the event not participate in any actual physical activity.

My oldest son was no where in sight as he jetted off at the starting buzzer. He came into view on his way back to the finish line looking determined to pull a good time. He did in fact finish in a great time of 32:58 to be exact. Awesome job! My youngest son and many of his friends kept right around me the rest of the way occasionally running ahead or lollygagging slightly behind. Their cute little sweaty red faces just smiling away completely oblivious of any disappointments in the day. To them, there was no better way to spend a Friday evening. We finished up fairly close together and my time was adequate but I don’t think much better than last year’s race where I walked it. Unlike last year however, this year ended in a terrible allergy attack and a subsequent visit to Urgent Care the next day. I drove the pharmacist nuts making her look up the potential side effects between Albuterol and Phentermine. My toxic reaction to the nature preserve in spring did however allow me to slip away from the event a bit early and regroup.

It is with a bit of sadness that I write this entry as I so want to provide happy ending for y’all. I am reminded that we did say from the beginning that this would be an adventure of honesty in the battle of the bulge with occasional bumps and bruises along the way. On a positive note, my bruises that day didn’t end in the usual pattern of “oh f@#$ it” then eat something fatty and creamy. I certainly had ample opportunity to dive into a cheesy pizza that night while at the pizza parlor. I stuck to the chicken salad and replaced emotional eating with brooding. Perhaps I just misunderstood my inner voice a few weeks earlier on the treadmill? As I haven’t heard it since, maybe I did.