29 lbs lost
Day of the big race! My first official attempt running a 5K! Yippie! I have been anticipating this for weeks but first I must drop in for my official Week 2 weigh of Biggest Looser contest. Walking into the gym, I slow to see a crappy Dr.’s office scale in place of the fabulous In Body Analysis scale from the previous 2 weeks. What happened? We were told that the other scale was a loner and we won’t get it back until closer to the end of the competition. To make matters worse, I heard grumblings from those weighing ahead of me that the new scale was weighing heavier than the last. Sure enough, I only saw a 2 lb loss when my scale at home said 4. Cranky! This once again put me behind in the weigh in and lands me in the 4th place spot. 4th place does not buy shakes people! My fabulous friend however crept into the #1 spot. I am very happy for her and would be even more delighted by her results if it didn’t negatively impact me. My husband is ashamed of me and I can’t say I blame him. Look what dangling a cash prize in front of me does to bring out the competitiveness. There is an Ashram somewhere that has my name booked for a future enlightenment session I’m sure but for now, game on.
I spent the day getting ready for the big race. I create an upbeat playlist for my iPod, put in my sparkly donut earrings and donned “Red Team” attire in honor of the Fitness Challenge. Of course, I have told everyone who I happen to have come in contact with over the past weeks that I was going to run the race. Everyone was rooting me on and I had visions of confetti as I crossed the finish line.
Then right before the race, a bad omen as the back to my one of my beloved sparkly donut earring fell off into the grass when I put head phones on. Oh no! Frantically rooting in the grass, it was not to be located in time. Now I would have to run the race without out my donuts. What’s a diva without her donuts? Just a bitch! Yikes!
The starting buzzer went off and I started off strong for about the first quarter mile. Then it got hard, I mean really hard. It was so much harder running outside than on the treadmill. I knew this would happen as I was just telling my neighbor last week this very same thing as she was treadmill running in prep for the race. Did I seriously think I would be exempt from this phenomenon? I felt every falling steps impact on my left dodgy knee. Not good as the dream of confetti filled finish line began to slip away. What started out as a best intention to run the entire race left me in an all out struggle to make it to the 1 mile mark. I am very sad to say that I had to stop short of the first mile marker due to the pain in my knee and general feeling of eminent death chasing my tail with no crash cart nearby.
Now I was deflated with the realization that my stint as running Goddess was squelched before my first debut. Nike would not be calling me to represent their next running shoe. Mostly, I was disappointed that this was the first real failed goal put forth on this journey. It’s not really about the running at all since I still hate it with a passion. It’s about missed expectations and humility. The added bonus of now having this failure very public was just icing on the donut. Note to self, limit sharing of huge goal with every person in the city until sure goal is at least attainable. Think dry run next time. I had no time to personally digest this failure for friends ran by raising their hands in question upon seeing me walk. I couldn’t come up with any good quips due to the lack of breath and no place for the “Snappy Come Backs” handbook in my exercise pants.
Digging in with head held high, I am me after all and lest anyone forget, this was still my moment, I walked. Waddling in my failure was for much later in bathtub sipping a protein shake. I hauled butt walking as fast as I could with the new goal to at least make a respectable time. Zipping around several 3rd graders who dawdled in the sunshine on the path in front of me clearly have a good time, I looked around for my kids. This was a family fun run after all where did my family go? Scratch that, at least where did my kids go since I knew my husband was most certainly not walking on the trail. He prefers to run the event not participate in any actual physical activity.
My oldest son was no where in sight as he jetted off at the starting buzzer. He came into view on his way back to the finish line looking determined to pull a good time. He did in fact finish in a great time of 32:58 to be exact. Awesome job! My youngest son and many of his friends kept right around me the rest of the way occasionally running ahead or lollygagging slightly behind. Their cute little sweaty red faces just smiling away completely oblivious of any disappointments in the day. To them, there was no better way to spend a Friday evening. We finished up fairly close together and my time was adequate but I don’t think much better than last year’s race where I walked it. Unlike last year however, this year ended in a terrible allergy attack and a subsequent visit to Urgent Care the next day. I drove the pharmacist nuts making her look up the potential side effects between Albuterol and Phentermine. My toxic reaction to the nature preserve in spring did however allow me to slip away from the event a bit early and regroup.
It is with a bit of sadness that I write this entry as I so want to provide happy ending for y’all. I am reminded that we did say from the beginning that this would be an adventure of honesty in the battle of the bulge with occasional bumps and bruises along the way. On a positive note, my bruises that day didn’t end in the usual pattern of “oh f@#$ it” then eat something fatty and creamy. I certainly had ample opportunity to dive into a cheesy pizza that night while at the pizza parlor. I stuck to the chicken salad and replaced emotional eating with brooding. Perhaps I just misunderstood my inner voice a few weeks earlier on the treadmill? As I haven’t heard it since, maybe I did.
Thursday, May 27, 2010
Day 71 Combat!
26 lbs lost
I am having a blast this week throwing myself into all these new fitness classes at the gym AND getting my treadmill running miles up to 3 miles! Yippee! I think I might actually be able to run that 5K coming up next week. Now that my 10 lb water weight has come off, I am settling into becoming workout goddess. I am sad to report ladies that I did not win the first week’s weigh in. Two other contestants topped me at 4+ percentage loss. Big sigh, but I am not too discouraged and I know I came into the competition already down 25 lbs. My initial first week’s honeymoon period of rapid weight loss is long gone. To my friend and fellow reader, good job getting the #2 spot. Be sure to keep a watchful eye over your left shoulder as I creep up on you like a ninja!
I am making huge strides in fitness level as I can actually get through all the classes with only fleeting moments of nausea. However, my body is revolting all the exercise with nightly appearances of Charlie Horses and now a strained hamstring. The price I pay for competition. Not daunted, I am taking to packing my various body parts in ice after each workout. I am also not above whimpering to my husband until he rubs out my calf and hamstring each night.
Along comes Friday and I decide to try a Combat Class. Hmm, ok sounds violent. I get in there and the instructor straps on her gloves. My interest is even more piqued. We start to add in boxing moves. Upper cuts, jabs, back kicks and then the round house kick! Wow, now this is really out of my box. Then the instructor starts to scream at us to sharpen our moves and hit harder. “Make them hurt! Kick their head! Don’t let them stand up!” Wow this IS violent. About 15 minutes in I start to get into it with each jab and upper cut as Eye of the Tiger starts loop reeling as the sound track in my brain. All other class participants fall away.
I am transported to the jungle and morph into Laura Croft type character. My high heeled, thigh high lug boots crunch fallen leaves on the jungle floor. As I turn around, braid swishing, it is abundantly clear that I am not alone. I turn to find my evil sparing partner, the witch from work whom I can’t stand is conveniently in the same jungle with me! Finally, justice will be served! I round house kick her in the stomach where with a grunt, she falls hard to the ground. Like a cat, she springs back up. Even in my fantasy she is a pain in the butt. I dodge her upper cut only to complete a powerful combination of right jab, upper cut, knee to the gut, head slam! This time she drops like a stone to the ground with a thud, a little trickle of blood oozing out of her upper lip. She’s outta here!
Oh that was so fun too bad I can’t knock her out for real or that I look that fabulous in thigh high lug boots and kaki short shorts….There’s always next class to kick her ass again.
I am having a blast this week throwing myself into all these new fitness classes at the gym AND getting my treadmill running miles up to 3 miles! Yippee! I think I might actually be able to run that 5K coming up next week. Now that my 10 lb water weight has come off, I am settling into becoming workout goddess. I am sad to report ladies that I did not win the first week’s weigh in. Two other contestants topped me at 4+ percentage loss. Big sigh, but I am not too discouraged and I know I came into the competition already down 25 lbs. My initial first week’s honeymoon period of rapid weight loss is long gone. To my friend and fellow reader, good job getting the #2 spot. Be sure to keep a watchful eye over your left shoulder as I creep up on you like a ninja!
I am making huge strides in fitness level as I can actually get through all the classes with only fleeting moments of nausea. However, my body is revolting all the exercise with nightly appearances of Charlie Horses and now a strained hamstring. The price I pay for competition. Not daunted, I am taking to packing my various body parts in ice after each workout. I am also not above whimpering to my husband until he rubs out my calf and hamstring each night.
Along comes Friday and I decide to try a Combat Class. Hmm, ok sounds violent. I get in there and the instructor straps on her gloves. My interest is even more piqued. We start to add in boxing moves. Upper cuts, jabs, back kicks and then the round house kick! Wow, now this is really out of my box. Then the instructor starts to scream at us to sharpen our moves and hit harder. “Make them hurt! Kick their head! Don’t let them stand up!” Wow this IS violent. About 15 minutes in I start to get into it with each jab and upper cut as Eye of the Tiger starts loop reeling as the sound track in my brain. All other class participants fall away.
I am transported to the jungle and morph into Laura Croft type character. My high heeled, thigh high lug boots crunch fallen leaves on the jungle floor. As I turn around, braid swishing, it is abundantly clear that I am not alone. I turn to find my evil sparing partner, the witch from work whom I can’t stand is conveniently in the same jungle with me! Finally, justice will be served! I round house kick her in the stomach where with a grunt, she falls hard to the ground. Like a cat, she springs back up. Even in my fantasy she is a pain in the butt. I dodge her upper cut only to complete a powerful combination of right jab, upper cut, knee to the gut, head slam! This time she drops like a stone to the ground with a thud, a little trickle of blood oozing out of her upper lip. She’s outta here!
Oh that was so fun too bad I can’t knock her out for real or that I look that fabulous in thigh high lug boots and kaki short shorts….There’s always next class to kick her ass again.
Friday, May 14, 2010
Day 64 Are You the Next Biggest Looser?
10.1 lbs gained
High off my mile + run I am ready for the next hurdle on the fitness ladder “The Biggest Looser Challenge”. Two months ago, I promised a friend that I would join a sanctioned Biggest Looser team challenge at her gym. Since BL is my most favorite show on TV, how could I resist? It is the perfect blend of drama, conniving characters, and stunning transformations all rolled into 1 hour. Let’s not forget the added bonus of torturing fat people through mind numbing workouts and total exploitation of personal pain as each contestant exposes their personal rock bottoms for millions to see. It is the ultimate guilty pleasure for us viewers. Of course some of us eat through the entire show each week, not to name names of course. Really? So weird!
Our local challenge will consist of 3 teams with my team being the Red Team under the fearless leadership of my friend. She has committing mind, body and soul to making the 8 weeks of torture “fun and motivating for all!”. We are wearing red, putting “Go Red” bumper stickers on our cars and some team members have even gone so far to dye their hair red. My friend’s RED enthusiasm stems from her own success in the last challenge. 26 lbs lighter, she is now officially the AFTER of the Before & After. Once again I am inspired. In my mind, the challenge will motivate me through the next 20 lbs as the Good Dr. recommended I stagger goals every 3 months to keep me motivated. I even talked a few long time friends into signing up with me. Maybe it will be “fun and motivating” after all.
Sign up day rolls around and I noticed the sign indicating a $500 first place prize. Now this caught my attention. Hmm…that could buy me a few weeks of protein shakes. Given that I have cashed in my very last stock option for shakes, $500 would be a welcome infusion to keep my blender running until my birthday. Impressed with my jogging success and now the added financially motivation, I feel the tingle of competition begin to seep into my bones. In the span of a few minutes I went from working on my next 20 lbs to total gym domination with winners t-shirt already made up! I started some casual research and found out that last season’s winner dropped 18% body weight. I ran out to my car and pulled out my calculator app on my phone and did a double take. Seeing the freshly calculated pound conversion displayed on my phone was staggering. Oh, shit, 32 lbs in 8 weeks! I am not on the Ranch! I have a life, kids, job, no Bob or Gillian and important things to do besides workout! AND, completely unlike the Ranch, this gym is fully of tiny, already fit and trim workout people. To them, 15 lbs is 20%. What to do? Need a plan…..
I shared my dilemma with my husband later that night and he suggested I level the playing field a bit. Ok? There was no way I was shoving any high fat/calorie food in my mouth after all the hard work and expense thus far. Now what? We debated several options and finally determined that I would need to go into the first weigh in 8-10 lbs heavier than I am now to have any chance. Visions of snow suits, lug boots and oh wait, bullet proof vest pop into my head! Hey wait, aren’t those really heavy but don’t show under clothes? I have a cop in the family, perhaps he could loan me one for the weigh in. Can you see me on the scale with shades, packin’ a bullet proof vest and some heat which in this case is my big ass! Nice! I was really enjoying the fantasy until my husband ruled out this option. Aww, no fun! He first cited that I was a L-U-N-A-T-I-I-C. Whatever, old news, geez! Then he made the more relevant point of me running the risk of being disqualified for cheating. Alright, I sadly thought, no bullet proof vest. Now as that option was blown, we reached into the Biggest Looser episode archives for the classic water loading trick. Ok this could work…. If I triple my sodium intake 24 hrs before the weigh in and start chugging water, I could pack on some pounds without actually gaining any weight! Genius! I had the fleeting thought of me looking like an Oompa Loompa as I roll on up to the scale.
Guilt set in for the shenanigan I was about to pull. What about total honest and integrity? I had to keep reminding myself that this was just game play. I bet many others were partaking in similar efforts. Wow, I’m convincing! After a while it sounded stupid not too.
On the day of the weigh 3 days later, I have consumed 10 pickles, 3 bouillon cubes and about 100 oz water. I am literally sloshing through the parking lot as I walk to the gym and oh God, I have to pee. I pushed myself to the front of the weigh in line ‘cause I thought my bladder would burst any minute. I am happy to report that I packed on a whopping 10.1 lbs in 24 hrs. Ha! Game on!
High off my mile + run I am ready for the next hurdle on the fitness ladder “The Biggest Looser Challenge”. Two months ago, I promised a friend that I would join a sanctioned Biggest Looser team challenge at her gym. Since BL is my most favorite show on TV, how could I resist? It is the perfect blend of drama, conniving characters, and stunning transformations all rolled into 1 hour. Let’s not forget the added bonus of torturing fat people through mind numbing workouts and total exploitation of personal pain as each contestant exposes their personal rock bottoms for millions to see. It is the ultimate guilty pleasure for us viewers. Of course some of us eat through the entire show each week, not to name names of course. Really? So weird!
Our local challenge will consist of 3 teams with my team being the Red Team under the fearless leadership of my friend. She has committing mind, body and soul to making the 8 weeks of torture “fun and motivating for all!”. We are wearing red, putting “Go Red” bumper stickers on our cars and some team members have even gone so far to dye their hair red. My friend’s RED enthusiasm stems from her own success in the last challenge. 26 lbs lighter, she is now officially the AFTER of the Before & After. Once again I am inspired. In my mind, the challenge will motivate me through the next 20 lbs as the Good Dr. recommended I stagger goals every 3 months to keep me motivated. I even talked a few long time friends into signing up with me. Maybe it will be “fun and motivating” after all.
Sign up day rolls around and I noticed the sign indicating a $500 first place prize. Now this caught my attention. Hmm…that could buy me a few weeks of protein shakes. Given that I have cashed in my very last stock option for shakes, $500 would be a welcome infusion to keep my blender running until my birthday. Impressed with my jogging success and now the added financially motivation, I feel the tingle of competition begin to seep into my bones. In the span of a few minutes I went from working on my next 20 lbs to total gym domination with winners t-shirt already made up! I started some casual research and found out that last season’s winner dropped 18% body weight. I ran out to my car and pulled out my calculator app on my phone and did a double take. Seeing the freshly calculated pound conversion displayed on my phone was staggering. Oh, shit, 32 lbs in 8 weeks! I am not on the Ranch! I have a life, kids, job, no Bob or Gillian and important things to do besides workout! AND, completely unlike the Ranch, this gym is fully of tiny, already fit and trim workout people. To them, 15 lbs is 20%. What to do? Need a plan…..
I shared my dilemma with my husband later that night and he suggested I level the playing field a bit. Ok? There was no way I was shoving any high fat/calorie food in my mouth after all the hard work and expense thus far. Now what? We debated several options and finally determined that I would need to go into the first weigh in 8-10 lbs heavier than I am now to have any chance. Visions of snow suits, lug boots and oh wait, bullet proof vest pop into my head! Hey wait, aren’t those really heavy but don’t show under clothes? I have a cop in the family, perhaps he could loan me one for the weigh in. Can you see me on the scale with shades, packin’ a bullet proof vest and some heat which in this case is my big ass! Nice! I was really enjoying the fantasy until my husband ruled out this option. Aww, no fun! He first cited that I was a L-U-N-A-T-I-I-C. Whatever, old news, geez! Then he made the more relevant point of me running the risk of being disqualified for cheating. Alright, I sadly thought, no bullet proof vest. Now as that option was blown, we reached into the Biggest Looser episode archives for the classic water loading trick. Ok this could work…. If I triple my sodium intake 24 hrs before the weigh in and start chugging water, I could pack on some pounds without actually gaining any weight! Genius! I had the fleeting thought of me looking like an Oompa Loompa as I roll on up to the scale.
Guilt set in for the shenanigan I was about to pull. What about total honest and integrity? I had to keep reminding myself that this was just game play. I bet many others were partaking in similar efforts. Wow, I’m convincing! After a while it sounded stupid not too.
On the day of the weigh 3 days later, I have consumed 10 pickles, 3 bouillon cubes and about 100 oz water. I am literally sloshing through the parking lot as I walk to the gym and oh God, I have to pee. I pushed myself to the front of the weigh in line ‘cause I thought my bladder would burst any minute. I am happy to report that I packed on a whopping 10.1 lbs in 24 hrs. Ha! Game on!
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
Day 60 – To Run a Mile in My Shoes
25 lbs lost
First off, thank you to fabulous friend who gave me ever so cute pink sprinkle donut earrings. They are my new treasure that I wear at the gym. Hee hee!
Ok Day 60, I am in the zone. Just ticking along now with my eating regime like a Hollywood Starlett. “Carbs? What? I don’t eat those?” I am feeling good about my success thus far on the journey. One key area I continue to work is the implementation of exercise in my daily life. Each day I wake up and yearn to see myself as an athletic person. This has never been my paradigm. I’m a reader, a home improvement junky, hard worker but definitely not an athlete. Completing a marathon and over 500 miles of training did not change this perception of me for me. Each time I have ventured to loose weight before I have exercised only to stop somewhere along the way. I don’t crave it and definitely up to this point do not see it as a part of who I am. Oh, you know those people who do. Exercising at god awful times in the morning or in climate weather. Disciplined and focused like they require it to breathe or something. I am of course only speculating as I stated earlier, do not share this passion.
Up to this point of this particular journey, I had been getting in 3 days a week of either cardio machines or walking with friends on the weekends. Our happy walking group was even treated to a private viewing of a wild turkey mating dance on one of our last jaunts. If my perception of the situation was correct, Tom was getting lucky that night with his moves!
Monday morning rolled around and I headed to the gym to hit the treadmill. About 3 minutes into a hill cycle, a thought streamed into my head. Run. What? I put it aside. 10 seconds later, there it was again. Run. Perplexed a bit, I got a little rush of excitement. Running is not listed as one of the acceptable activities in my box so imagine my intrigue. Not once in the past 20 years has this thought ever crossed my mind before. In fact, I have been through 2 personal trainers who suggested the same. Both received a verbal pimp slap as I promptly discounted their suggestion. Must have worked too since neither of them ever suggested it again. I don’t run unless being chased and seriously depends upon who’s doing the chasing or how badly I don’t want to get caught.
But there was this thought floating up from the subconscious again not in mockery, with force or judgment, just simply Run. Somehow it slipped inside my clearly defined parameter of self just patiently waiting for me to convert thought into action.
I scanned the cardio room to see if anyone was watching and kicked up the machine before I could rethink. I Ran. Two minutes. Three minutes. Hmm, I wasn’t dying yet. Interested, I kept going. 5 minutes, 10 minutes, 14 minutes and then I saw the machine hit the mile mark. I cracked what must have been the goofiest of smiles as I still didn’t feel done. Crazy, this was my first mile since PE in the 9th grade and I wasn’t tired yet? I kept going until I reached 1.5 miles. This was the first inkling that maybe just maybe I could stretch my box a bit to accommodate a new perception of self. This was definitely new.
One of my key goals when starting this adventure was not really to wear a smaller size, look good or even to feel better. Ok, all fabulous benefits of course but what I wanted was to learn something new about my self to finally tackle this beast. There was also another secret little dream, to be able to roller skate outside by my birthday. What? Yes, you read that right. I know I just lost about half of you at this point as this may not coincide with your own goals. The other half of you are shaking your heads smiling as I know you can see this vision.
Why skating? It is not due to a pent up passion for leg warmers however nice they may be. It’s not even a secret fantasy to join the derby circuit. Skating was my absolute most favorite activity as a kid. Every Saturday for years I got to lace up my boots and roll around the rink for a few hours. It always made me feel amazing. I loved the speed, maneuverability and how you could feel every muscle in your lower half working together to keep you moving in a forward trajectory. Unless of course you chose to skate backwards! Pure joy. For you, these feelings maybe invoked through many other very fine activities. May it be biking, running or even kayaking! For me, it’s skating. That 1.5 mile run on the treadmill was the first glimmer that maybe my secret dream of skating with full protective gear and helmet could be an actual reality by my birthday. I will have to get around my husband first who thinks I will kill myself attempting this feat. Minor obstacle as one shot with crazy eyes will do the trick.
Back to the treadmill no, running did not give me this same feeling as skating! Come on, be real. It’s still me and it was still running and no big bad dude in curlers was chasing me through a Detroit bus station (another story, another time). It was major hideous but the point was, I didn’t die and it was definitely something new. It was definitely outside my typical yo-yo pattern. I have even done it again since knocking out 1.75 miles with plans to run 2 miles of a 5K next Friday. Imagine that! Wish I could skate it instead ;) For now, I settle with running.
First off, thank you to fabulous friend who gave me ever so cute pink sprinkle donut earrings. They are my new treasure that I wear at the gym. Hee hee!
Ok Day 60, I am in the zone. Just ticking along now with my eating regime like a Hollywood Starlett. “Carbs? What? I don’t eat those?” I am feeling good about my success thus far on the journey. One key area I continue to work is the implementation of exercise in my daily life. Each day I wake up and yearn to see myself as an athletic person. This has never been my paradigm. I’m a reader, a home improvement junky, hard worker but definitely not an athlete. Completing a marathon and over 500 miles of training did not change this perception of me for me. Each time I have ventured to loose weight before I have exercised only to stop somewhere along the way. I don’t crave it and definitely up to this point do not see it as a part of who I am. Oh, you know those people who do. Exercising at god awful times in the morning or in climate weather. Disciplined and focused like they require it to breathe or something. I am of course only speculating as I stated earlier, do not share this passion.
Up to this point of this particular journey, I had been getting in 3 days a week of either cardio machines or walking with friends on the weekends. Our happy walking group was even treated to a private viewing of a wild turkey mating dance on one of our last jaunts. If my perception of the situation was correct, Tom was getting lucky that night with his moves!
Monday morning rolled around and I headed to the gym to hit the treadmill. About 3 minutes into a hill cycle, a thought streamed into my head. Run. What? I put it aside. 10 seconds later, there it was again. Run. Perplexed a bit, I got a little rush of excitement. Running is not listed as one of the acceptable activities in my box so imagine my intrigue. Not once in the past 20 years has this thought ever crossed my mind before. In fact, I have been through 2 personal trainers who suggested the same. Both received a verbal pimp slap as I promptly discounted their suggestion. Must have worked too since neither of them ever suggested it again. I don’t run unless being chased and seriously depends upon who’s doing the chasing or how badly I don’t want to get caught.
But there was this thought floating up from the subconscious again not in mockery, with force or judgment, just simply Run. Somehow it slipped inside my clearly defined parameter of self just patiently waiting for me to convert thought into action.
I scanned the cardio room to see if anyone was watching and kicked up the machine before I could rethink. I Ran. Two minutes. Three minutes. Hmm, I wasn’t dying yet. Interested, I kept going. 5 minutes, 10 minutes, 14 minutes and then I saw the machine hit the mile mark. I cracked what must have been the goofiest of smiles as I still didn’t feel done. Crazy, this was my first mile since PE in the 9th grade and I wasn’t tired yet? I kept going until I reached 1.5 miles. This was the first inkling that maybe just maybe I could stretch my box a bit to accommodate a new perception of self. This was definitely new.
One of my key goals when starting this adventure was not really to wear a smaller size, look good or even to feel better. Ok, all fabulous benefits of course but what I wanted was to learn something new about my self to finally tackle this beast. There was also another secret little dream, to be able to roller skate outside by my birthday. What? Yes, you read that right. I know I just lost about half of you at this point as this may not coincide with your own goals. The other half of you are shaking your heads smiling as I know you can see this vision.
Why skating? It is not due to a pent up passion for leg warmers however nice they may be. It’s not even a secret fantasy to join the derby circuit. Skating was my absolute most favorite activity as a kid. Every Saturday for years I got to lace up my boots and roll around the rink for a few hours. It always made me feel amazing. I loved the speed, maneuverability and how you could feel every muscle in your lower half working together to keep you moving in a forward trajectory. Unless of course you chose to skate backwards! Pure joy. For you, these feelings maybe invoked through many other very fine activities. May it be biking, running or even kayaking! For me, it’s skating. That 1.5 mile run on the treadmill was the first glimmer that maybe my secret dream of skating with full protective gear and helmet could be an actual reality by my birthday. I will have to get around my husband first who thinks I will kill myself attempting this feat. Minor obstacle as one shot with crazy eyes will do the trick.
Back to the treadmill no, running did not give me this same feeling as skating! Come on, be real. It’s still me and it was still running and no big bad dude in curlers was chasing me through a Detroit bus station (another story, another time). It was major hideous but the point was, I didn’t die and it was definitely something new. It was definitely outside my typical yo-yo pattern. I have even done it again since knocking out 1.75 miles with plans to run 2 miles of a 5K next Friday. Imagine that! Wish I could skate it instead ;) For now, I settle with running.
Day 50 Dangerous Liaisons - Sufferin’ Sucralose!
22 lbs lost
Rolling along in my 7th week I must admit that I have had a few little binges. I discovered right before our vacation that Sugar Free Life Savers taste great and take away the yucky dry mouth feeling caused by the Phentermine. Dream product! So a few times I indulged in 2 or say 15 at a time. It took 3 separate Life Saver liaisons before linking those delicious hard candies to the raging gastrointestinal storms that ensued shortly after said liaison. The first time, I thought for sure I had food poisoning since my youngest was also having tummy problems. Imodium was my friend that day as I weathered the moderate storm. Second round was 4 days later during an outing of the Broadway production of Little House on the Prairie. The entire performance my stomach was churning so loudly and painfully that I actually thought I might explode all over the 2nd tier. Unfortunate situation for friend sitting next to me in the dark theater. I couldn’t tell you what was worse, the sound of my rumblings or the subpar singing of Melissa Gilbert as Ma Ingles. My friend leaned over and suggested perhaps my stomach was beginning to eat itself from the inside out due to the crazy protein diet? She really got me thinking then as doubt began to creep in. Could it be?
Another 3 days passed before my last and most heated Life Saver Liaison with a family sized bag. 30 minutes after bag completion, my brain began picking up on the pattern my stomach was now feeling. The connection was solidified after 5 hours of deep thought induced by a night spent in the bathroom. Damn, the jig is up and I have to end another affair! So sad. Why can’t I be addicted to exercise, scrap booking or even beanie baby collecting? Ok, it’s creepy but at least not harmful to one’s health. What is an obsessive compulsive to do without a binge buddy?
At 3 am I dug the empty bag out of the trash and read the very fine print “Contains Sucralose. Over consumption of product has a laxative effect”. Well shit, there you have it. I will take it upon myself to write Wrigley’s with a suggested warning change. My version would read “Caution excessive use of product is comparable to gastric effects caused by ingesting Tijuana street taco due to poor tequila induced judgment call. Think you, taco and Tijuana bathroom facilities before eating more than 2.” This would at least be more helpful in warding off would be bingers.
Needless to say, the dangerous liaison is over. Why are those evil chemicals in products sold over the counter to diabetics and children? I went back to chewing Eclipse gum and feeling quite put out to have not found a substitute yet. Whatever, blah, blah, blah I know I should reach deep and stop binging all together. Not ready for that much personal growth yet and frankly there is no money left for qualified therapist until my protein shake consumption subsides. Until then, trolling for a new buddy….
Rolling along in my 7th week I must admit that I have had a few little binges. I discovered right before our vacation that Sugar Free Life Savers taste great and take away the yucky dry mouth feeling caused by the Phentermine. Dream product! So a few times I indulged in 2 or say 15 at a time. It took 3 separate Life Saver liaisons before linking those delicious hard candies to the raging gastrointestinal storms that ensued shortly after said liaison. The first time, I thought for sure I had food poisoning since my youngest was also having tummy problems. Imodium was my friend that day as I weathered the moderate storm. Second round was 4 days later during an outing of the Broadway production of Little House on the Prairie. The entire performance my stomach was churning so loudly and painfully that I actually thought I might explode all over the 2nd tier. Unfortunate situation for friend sitting next to me in the dark theater. I couldn’t tell you what was worse, the sound of my rumblings or the subpar singing of Melissa Gilbert as Ma Ingles. My friend leaned over and suggested perhaps my stomach was beginning to eat itself from the inside out due to the crazy protein diet? She really got me thinking then as doubt began to creep in. Could it be?
Another 3 days passed before my last and most heated Life Saver Liaison with a family sized bag. 30 minutes after bag completion, my brain began picking up on the pattern my stomach was now feeling. The connection was solidified after 5 hours of deep thought induced by a night spent in the bathroom. Damn, the jig is up and I have to end another affair! So sad. Why can’t I be addicted to exercise, scrap booking or even beanie baby collecting? Ok, it’s creepy but at least not harmful to one’s health. What is an obsessive compulsive to do without a binge buddy?
At 3 am I dug the empty bag out of the trash and read the very fine print “Contains Sucralose. Over consumption of product has a laxative effect”. Well shit, there you have it. I will take it upon myself to write Wrigley’s with a suggested warning change. My version would read “Caution excessive use of product is comparable to gastric effects caused by ingesting Tijuana street taco due to poor tequila induced judgment call. Think you, taco and Tijuana bathroom facilities before eating more than 2.” This would at least be more helpful in warding off would be bingers.
Needless to say, the dangerous liaison is over. Why are those evil chemicals in products sold over the counter to diabetics and children? I went back to chewing Eclipse gum and feeling quite put out to have not found a substitute yet. Whatever, blah, blah, blah I know I should reach deep and stop binging all together. Not ready for that much personal growth yet and frankly there is no money left for qualified therapist until my protein shake consumption subsides. Until then, trolling for a new buddy….
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